I had a tough couple of days after hearing that my grandmother passed. Oh, I expected to feel sorrow over the lost opportunities and possibilities. And I did.
What I wasn't expected was how much this event would make me miss my mother. There is something about that historic connection to family that intrigues us, pulls us, even defines us. I am no expert on the subject, but I think that is right and normal.
I learned a few valuable things over the last two days. First, I learned that women's strength should never be underestimated. We can do more than one thing at a time, we are capable of handling more than one crisis at a time, we can show concern in more than one way, and we don't sit around waiting for people to tells us how or when to do it. We roll up our sleeves and dive right in.
I learned that there is still plenty of love in the world. As the word got out that I had suffered a loss, calls and emails and cards came out of nowhere. It was overwhelming to feel that kind of love. Thanks to everyone who reached out to me. It meant a lot.
I learned to expect the unexpected. And that somethings that you expect to happen never will, no matter how much you want it.
Mikel had homemade chili and cornbread waiting for me when I got home tonight. It was delicious, and a real treat not to have to cook. I'm worn out from the grieving - I think I'm out of tears. And I'm ready to move forward.