Things I Didn't Need to See

Here are some things I did not need to see on my way to work today:

• the sticker in the back glass of the monster pick up truck that reads slapaho
• all of those other stickers in the back windows of all of those other trucks that depict Calvin peeing on something
• the pack of boys walking beside the road holding on to their "parts" while their baggy shorts hung below their backsides
• the boxer shorts being worn by that same pack of boys
• the fourth grader wearing eye shadow and mascara
• the middle-schooler with the cigarette hanging out of his mouth
• the sixteen-year-olds in my neighborhood driving nicer cars than I own
• the beer billboard that featured the headless upper torso of a young woman in a cut off t-shirt, allowing a peek at the underside of her breasts
• the "gentlemen's" clubs billboards that suggest that men can have a better time gazing at strangers than spending time with their own partners
• the huge, faded, rusty billboard on the side of the freeway with an arrow pointing the way to Plastic Surgery

These things can all be summed up in one word - tasteless.